Everything Happen Must Have A Reason

Friday, February 17, 2017
بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيمِ

Yeay updating my blog again! Alhamdulillah, dah start new semester. Clinical year! Memang banyak hadap disease, treatment. Redha lah kan. So far, dah one week start new semester ni, macam okay lah. Hahaha. I don't have any problem with my studies so far. Today, I got my result from previous semester, Alhamdulillah again, a good news. I did really well, Praise to Allah. Walaupun rasanya last semester banyak main-main.

Dah seminggu after semester break, lot of things happened. Bad and good. Both. Nak cerita yang good dulu ke bad dulu? Korang nak dengar yang mana dulu? Kalau nak dengar yang bad dulu, angkat kaki. Kalau nak dengar yang good dulu, angkat tangan. Hahahaha. Orang cakap lagi afdhal kita cerita pasal good dulu. Okay, first, I got to meet my best-friends and we got to spend lot of time together. Even some of us not in the same class for this new semester, we still try our best untuk spend time together. Second, despite of having lot of problems, I got to know who are always there for me and who are never give a damn about me. Alhamdulillah, I have a lot of people that always support me and always be there for me. Third, I did move on from my previous relationship. I am not saying that I am totally move on from him, but, what can I say that, I don't really feel sad or longing for his presence, which is, it is good for me.

Bad things happened, hmm. Well, I guess trusting people 100% are not a good idea. Because certain people might be jenis spesies tikam belakang. But, it is okay, let Allah punish them. At this moment also I got to know so many fake people around me. Which I thought a true friend, are not really true actually. Hahahaha. When I tried to share about my problem with them, masa tu lah diorang busy. And if I asked for help, bluetick je diaorang kasi. Once I am fine, pandai pula diaorang text tanya, if everything okay. Hahaha. Maybe I should just remove them from my life. Shuh, shuh.

Redha, everything that happen to me, there must be a reason behind everything. I don't really wanna know what is the reason but, I just hope that I can learn from all these happened. Allah is the best planner, and I trust Him. Whatever happened to me, redha. I will be fine, I will be okay.


Wanna Run Away, but....

Monday, February 06, 2017

Cuba teka, I just wrote this post just now tapi lupa nak save into draft. Hilang semua benda. And here I am, have to write everything all over again. Fuh, life is getting tougher eh, Nik? Haha.

So I am finally at home. Actually last night, since this few days, I have been warded for dengue. Alhamdulillah, I feel so much better. Praise to Allah. Tapi demam still ada dan sakit-sakit badan pun still ada. Normal, I used to it.

I just talked to my girl-best-friend just now. How I wish I can run away from this life for a while. Okay, do not get a wrong idea, I am not giving up of my life. Cuma, rasa nak give myself a break. I wanna go somewhere yang tenang, tak ada orang yang Nik kenal, tak ada orang yang kenal Nik. Just me myself and my peaceful mind. But, then back to reality, I can't. I don't even know where to go.

These few days, I keep on being disturb by fake account. Macam biasa. Same drama, same person, same stories. But, it has been a little bit over dramatic because it is involving my ex-boyfriend's fangirl. Oh yes people, he is not Brad Pitt, he is not Tom Cruise. He is just him. Tapi orang minat dia sampai obses. Oh god! Haha luckily he is my ex-boyfriend. Kalau boyfriend, sumpah rasa insecure yang amat. Hahaha. The story is getting a little bit interesting because semua sekali terbongkar. I mean, I know who get involved in these fake account things, who have planned all those things. It doesn't even surprised me, dah boleh agak actually. Thank you to my ex-boyfriend, IH for being supportive and for being protective. I couldn't ask for more. Haha somehow I feel like he still loves me but well, my heart, right now, having this kind of complicated situation when it always denying every single thing. All positives will be negatives. All negatives will be positives. You get what I mean right. I just thought that he might be tired dealing with all these stupid situation and stupid DMs. But, Alhamdulillah lepas ni he doesn't need to deal with all these anymore. Alhamdulillah. At least, dia dah tak perlu pening kepala and can focus on his life and his studies. Everything settle down with just one decision. I am glad!

My previous relationship, my feelings, my ex-boyfriend? I don't wanna think about that. Rasa macam it is the right time to move on and start a new life. Stop hanging onto someone, stop hoping for something that won't never happen. Rasa macam dah give-up with my own feelings. I choose to let go and choose to be by my own for this time being. Tak rasa nak relationship. Let's just say that hati cheq mati right now. I don't feel anything. It is totally kosong. Thank you for that my dear ex-boyfriend. What I know is, 'What are meant to be will always find it ways together' . So let's just wait and see.

My parents, my family. I don't wanna talk about this. What can I do right now, praying for the best. Both my mom and dad, they know what the best for them. I am going to support both of their decision. I love both of them. Will always love my family. So yeah!

I don't have problem with my studies so far. Everything fine. Alhamdulillah.

Oh one more thing, I am a little bit confuse with something. These one of the fake accounts told me that she hates me because of my attitude and my kind-hearted character. Hahaha this is funny for sure. I don't know what is wrong with people nowadays. Jadi jahat, people will judge you. Jadi baik pun, people will hate you. So nak jadi apa ni? Whatever it is, I will always being myself, I am Nik. You like it or not, well I am still Nik. Hahaha

My 2017, first month of 2017 is suck. I have to deal with a lot of things. And everything is sick. Tak tahu lah nak expect apa this year. But yeah, Allah is Great, He is the Best Planner. Allah tak akan beri ujian kepada seseorang jika dirinya tak mampu. Kan? Alhamdulillah for all these. Praise to Allah.

May Allah bless everyone and May Allah ease everything. Take care everyone! And be strong.

Wallahualam. See you guys soon!
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